Call to Prayer

Hi everyone…I have an urgent request. I'm nearly sick on behalf of a good friend whose water broke this morning. She is only 25-weeks pregnant. Please pray for her that they will be able to keep the baby inside longer and that the life of her precious daughter will be spared. Thanks!

Water, Water Everywhere

Last year for Christmas, we crammed everything into one day, and it pretty much wore us all out. This year we did our family celebration in the morning when Adam got home from work, and then went to his parents for the afternoon. Saturday, we spent the afternoon at my parents. This method seemed to be much easier on the kids than trying to go everywhere in one day…and eat all that food. ;)

I'll do an actual Christmas post once I download the pictures…we had a blast. However, when we came home Saturday, we had a most unexpected visitor…3"of water covering the entire basement. If I hadn't been too tired, I would have considered launching fish to let Kaylee get some indoor use of her fishing pole. Instead, I pretty much cried. Then pulled it together. The dogs were huddled together in their crate to avoid getting wet. They were thankful to be released from the basement pool.

We then called in the troops. Adam's parents were the first to arrive. I had already put Logan to bed, but Kaylee was overtired and was refusing bed. Fortunately Penny was there to step in to take care of her because I was in no frame of mind to deal with that.

My dad and brother were the next to arrive with blocks to lift things up on, fans and extension cords. I gave Adam a new Shop-Vac for Christmas, but wasn't really planning on him needing to use it the following day. I mean it would have been fine if he wanted to clean out the car, but a flood in the basement? Really? After running the vacuum for forever, talking to a professional, Adam and I decided we would rip up all of our new extremely wet carpet and just trash it. We didn't want to pay a fortune on professional dehumidifiers and fans only to find the carpet still smelled and we would need to replace it anyway.

A while later Megan and Justin showed up to finish helping. Megan cleaned upstairs…washing dishes, putting away toys and sweeping the floor.

We've been through this before. We know how it goes. When Kaylee was a few months old, our kitchen had to be entirely replaced due to water damage. I was without a fully functional kitchen for three months. Fortunately, this time being in the basement, we can go on and close the door as we progress in the clean up. The carpet was the biggest loss, so it could have been much worse. It's going to be a headache to deal with, but it's going to work out.

I had it on my list to really work in the basement, cleaning and organizing, but I hadn't really intended to clean under the carpet and buy new carpet. ;)

Funny Bubba

Wow…someone hold me back. It's been a while since I've posted this much. I suppose it has something to do with being caught up on work and most of the housework. Okay, not all of the housework, but enough… Well, not really enough, but…

Logan continues to crack us up. It is such a joy to see his little personality blossom before our eyes.

Random Logan things…

Just now, I caught him walking around, stopping short of certain objects, knocking his head on said object, turning, scowling, walking to next object and repeating.

Yesterday, as I was making cookies, he walked up to me saying, "Mamma, mamma, mamma." I stopped and bent down to pick him up. He hugged me, then proceeded to lavish on me several slobbery kisses. So sweet. Then he grabbed my face and wouldn't let go. That's my boy.

Lately, Logan has been going into rooms by himself and closing the door behind him. This keeps me on my feet, going room to room, opening doors, relocating him and whatnot. I went back to find him in Kaylee's room, having flipped a clothes basket upside down and he was standing on it messing with her CD player. Don't say the Boy can't get to what he wants to get!

The Boy also has rhythm. He can be found listening to music, swaying his shoulders and hips. It's pretty much the funniest thing ever.

Pictures

Here are a few random pictures…just because.

Before You Know It

While growing up, my dad used the phrase, "It will be here before you know it," all the time. He would say this when referring to a day or event that we were eagerly anticipating. As children, anything we were waiting for seemed eons away, even if it was Christmas Eve and Christmas we were waiting for. I remember countless nights, lying in bed literally bouncing with excitement. It never seemed it would get here soon enough. When we got older, my brother and I would play games and do anything we could late into the evening because we were too excited to sleep. It will be here before you know it.

Going into the holiday season, my heart keeps going back to that phrase. It will be here before you know it. And although being an adult with children of my own changed the responsibilities of preparing for Christmas, I still can't wait. But as I reflect on this past year, the Lord has been using the wisdom in Dad's phrase toward other aspects of my life.

There are so many things swirling around in my head and my heart that I can only start to grasp.

I've thought about the phrase in reference to my children growing up. Life right now seems to be swarming with diapers, binkies, tantrums, snotty noses, diaper rash, and never-ending potty training. I think about the things I'd like to be able to do, but the kids are too young right now. It will be here before you know it. How true that is. It seems like just yesterday I was that kid in my bed, bouncing up and down, waiting to see what was under the tree, and now I have kids myself.

I tend to always be anticipating the next thing. Planning. Getting ready for. Waiting. But not only will all these things be here before I know it, they will be OVER before I know it.

Now I'm not much of one to make New Year's Resolutions, so I'm not going to dub it as such, but this next year I want to focus on treasuring each moment. Don't get me wrong… In no way do I dislike the baby and toddler stage. Quite the contrary. I love it. It's more a general mindset I want to work on. I feel that I'm always waiting for one thing to end and the next to start. If there is something I'm waiting for that is three months away, well…hurry up already. Never mind what might happen in those three months, just get to it.

While I know some of this is the way I'm wired, I also know I can change to a certain extent. So today, the day before Christmas, I want to slow down. Enjoy this day, because tomorrow will be here and be over before I know it. Soon the year will turn over to a new one, filled with experiences and journeys. I can't wait to see what happens, but I will. I will wait and be patient and know today is where I am. I cannot make time go faster or slow down, so I might as well live up every moment.

Nutcracker

So much has been going on, and so little posting about it. Several weeks ago, I took Kaylee to see the Nutcracker. It was danced by the same place I danced with when I was in high school and before. It was fun seeing some things that stayed the same and a lot that has changed. We didn't have very good seats, and Kaylee was having a hard time seeing. So…for the entire second half, I stood at the back and held her. It was much better that she could see, although I think she would have been better to have waited one more year before tackling such a long performance.

My shoulder still hurts from holding her for so long. I injured it several years back when I…ahem…fell off a bridge. I suppose the longevity of holding her stressed it too much, and looking back it wasn't a very smart move. Lesson learned, for sure. Having Kaylee there was a special memory, and I hope to be able to do it for many years to come.

She still talks about it, and does her own little dance moves around the house. I look at her and wonder if she, too, will take up dance and love it as much as I did and still do. I would love to see her do it, but there is no pressure if she doesn't. ;)

 

Where Has Time Gone?

I remember back to being in school, and how the a week before any break would drag on, yet get to the break and it would fly by. Well, I think that life, especially life with kids is like those breaks…time just flies. Cliché, I know, but true. I remember so clearly the day I had Kaylee, and now she is almost 3. Just as clear are the memories of having Logan…and he's 14 months.

Little Man is starting to get the hang of this walking thing. He stands up, gets his balance, and takes off…then gets so excited he has to drop to his knees in laughter and take off crawling at lightning speed. He is so funny.

Lately, Kaylee has been pushing some boundaries and trying out a dose of stubbornness. For the most part, she remains a good, obedient child. Because of that, the times she tries us are really…well, trying. For about a week, I thought we had the potty training thing figured out. Or rather, I thought she had it figured out. She was remembering to tell us before, even sometimes with time to spare and always refusing to have an accident. Then suddenly, nothing. Nada. Never asks to go to the bathroom. Almost constant accidents. I'm sure this is part of the process, but for real…I have more to do with my time than clean the floor and the couch! Yes, that's right…the couch. (once…only once. Thank the Lord.)

I know this phase is just that, a phase. Adam and I just have to figure out how to deal with it…when an accident is just an accident and when it might be more. The training here is as much for us as her. It's our job to learn to deal with her in the appropriate and loving manner, but boy…it sure is easy to fly off the handle.

Yesterday, we put up the tree and ornaments. Both of the kids loved it…Kaylee was a better help than Logan. ;) She carefully placed ornament after ornament on specifically picked branches. Logan in turn, came over, removed a few and tasted a few. We now have a circular gate around the tree for its protection. (You know, after Logan pulled two flowers off an ornament and brought a button to Adam, and then one to me…choking does not equal a good time, in case you're wondering.)

For some crazy reason, we decided to face the madness on Black Friday. The kids spent the night with my parents so Adam and I could get up at an hour that shouldn't be seen, to shop. Sad. Depraved. But true. We actually were able to save a lot of money, making it worth it in the end. We had a list of stores and exact items to be purchased in each store. The stores were listed according to times they opened. We were in line, near the front, at Kohl's before it opened. We still have a few things to get, but were able to accomplish most of our shopping that day.

There are so many blog posts swirling around in my head…hopefully soon I'll be able to get a grasp on them and write them. Stay tuned…

In Remembrance

Last Friday, my 97-year-old grandfather passed away. We knew it was coming, yet there was still a part of me that wondered if it would ever happen. Gran seemed to deny death on more than one occasion. Several weeks ago, Mom called to tell me unless there was a miracle, they didn't think he was going to make it through the night.

Not only did he make it through the night, he lived for several more weeks, making quite a recovery for a while. The last week, however, was basically horrible. He didn't eat or drink, and the last few days lost the ability to swallow. He was on consistent morphine to ensure he wasn't in pain as he couldn't really let us know. As hard as it was to know he was going to die, death was merciful. I miss him dearly, but I am glad he was able to go peacefully and not prolong his suffering.

Growing up, we only lived about 10 or 15 minutes away from Gran and Grandma, so we spent a lot of time with them. Jason and I were their only grandchildren, so spoiled we were. I remember countless fake fishing trips, then length of which wouldn't have even been time enough to actually catch anything…which was good because I don't think we ever used bait or lures or anything of the like. I simply wanted to go fishing, so I guess we took a pole and I probably pretended to fish for about 10 seconds and went onto the next thing…more than likely shopping.

I have never really thought about it, but I just realized they didn't keep many (or any) toys at their house, but we sure found enough things to do. I remember some dirt-old typewriters in an old, dilapidated storage shed at the top of their hill. I loved to go up there and pretend to type. I'm sure I drove them crazy with all the things I wanted to do, but they went along with it.

Gran was a man of many stories. Of course, as I was growing up I figured everything he was recounting was exactly right. I have sense learned that the stories, if true at all, were at the least embellished to the hilt.

Gran was also a man who refused to slow down, perhaps contributing to his long life. He drove his car into his 90s. Also into his 90s, he would come to our house and walk the mammoth dog around the neighborhood. One time, in fact, they bought an ice-cream cone, walked the entire way to the park by the river, and good ole Dylan hopped onto the picnic table and at the ice cream. Ahem… Right.

He was an excellent woodcrafter. Gran made the glass-door bookcase that is built into a wall at my parent's old house. He made a grandfather clock…fitting. And, though my mind is blanking out, many other things.

I miss Gran, but after watching his brothers and sister, his wife, a daughter, and almost all the other family members in his generation pass, it was time for him. His body was done and ready for rest. We all have memories to keep him alive in our hearts, so the peace we have knowing he isn't suffering anymore calms our spirits and helps us through this time.

 

Such a Big Girl

I'm so tired. Really, I should be sleeping. Now if I had a dollar for every time I read that on someone's blog, I'd be rich, but I have yet to figure out how to do that.

Ahem.

My baby girl has moved up in the world. She is now sleeping in a big-girl bed! She is actually adjusting very well at night, but naptime is not as great. I mean, really, it's light outside and all of the fun in her room is illuminated. I've opened the door at various time to find her jumping on the bed (not allowed, but ever so fun), standing on her guardrails removing letters from her wall, and playing with various toys.

I honestly can't believe how quickly she is growing up. It seems like just the day before yesterday I was bringing her home from the hospital.

It would be absolutely impossible to write down all the new things she does and says in one blog…much less when I'm so tired I really have no idea what I am writing, but here are a few:

1. count to 20.

2. count backward from 10.

3. spell her name.

4. Remember numerous words and phrases in Spanish.

5. Recount entire conversations days after they have happened. (Yes, we have to watch everything we say…I mean eh-vah-reh-thing.)

6. Recognize most letters. (Of course she's been able to say her alphabet for at least a year.)

7. Pray by herself.

8. Put on the charm when she wants to get her way.

9. Make up pretend stories and things to play.

10. Make a friend anywhere she goes.

 

Well, I suppose I'll leave it at a 10 list. I can't type anymore…

Crazy Man on the Lose!

We've been trying for months to assist Logan with walking. Most of the time, he bends his legs and crumples to the floor…then crawls off as fast as he can. Bascially what he's been saying is, "Mom and Dad, this walking stuff…not so interested. In case you haven't noticed I'm getting into everything I want to." Um, yes, we noticed. Do you remember that new confounded contraption on the cupboard? Yes dear, that's a child-safety lock to keep you out.

Ahem…anyway. Last night, almost out of the blue, Logan decided to take some small steps. All.by.himself. And now…well, the kid is crazy. Crawling is still his primary and preferred mode of transportation…I take that back…that would be being carried. But he still craws most of the time. When he walks though, he laughs and gets all crazy. He takes a few steps and then throws himself on the floor and rolls in more laughter. He squeals. He rolls. Then he takes off crawling. Then comes back and does it again.

World watch out! I may be wobbly, but I'm on my way.

Help, Please

Hey there. I'm looking for a baby carrier that I can haul lazy Logan around in. I have a snugli thing as well as a sling. BUT, I would really like something I can put to the side. You know, just like I'm carrying him on my hip, but without needing to use my hands. Because, well, sometimes, just sometimes I need my hands for other things. The other carriers I have are better suited for smaller babies, too.

So if you have a suggestion, that would be great. I'd also rather not have to spend an arm and a leg on it because well, I use those too.

So We Remember

Kids are always saying funny, silly, crazy things. Sometimes we can figure out the things Kaylee says, other times…well…

A few days ago, Adam's dad was picking on Kaylee. Immediately after he said something she started whining, or something relatively close. Deiciding to pick on Eddie, I picked Kaylee up, cuddled her and said, "Oh, did Pops hurt your feelings?"

Kaylee: "No."

However, she continued to whine. About a second later, she came over to me, "I hurt my feelings."

Me: "Where are your feelings?"

Kaylee: "They're in my shoes."

***There you have it folks, if your feelings are hurt, change your shoes. Easy as that. ;)

Pictures

Have I mentioned how much I like pictures? I like taking them and looking at them. In the near future, I need to learn how to use Photoshop. Adam bought me a training CD, which I've looked at some, but haven't really been able to take enough time to learn it. It's such a "big" program. So, in the meantime, here are a few unedited, unplayedwith, pictures. ~Enjoy~

Helping Hand

I'm hoping this will make sense. When I write later in the evening, or close to midnight, whichever the case might be, I sometimes have no idea what I'm saying. What's that? I never know what I'm saying? Okay, you're right.

The other day when we were at the pumpkin patch, yet another thing I need to post about, there was a guy who thought he dropped his wallet. Somewhere.in.the.field. Not that there were tons of people there, but before long every single person who was at the patch was out looking for his wallet. His wife ended up going home to see if he left it. Honestly, I wanted to stay longer to see if it was at home or if he found it, but we had to go after helping look for at least 20 minutes.

Not long ago some lady was walking out of Costco with her cart overflowing…a common site in that place. As she went over a bump, the entire top contents of the cart spilled out into the parking lot. Mom ran to help her, picking up all she could carry, and following them to their car to help load it.

Today, some guy was pushing his car out of the road. As soon as I saw him, some other guy was running to help him.

You may be wondering the connection…no, it was not the guy who lost his wallet pushing his car because he ran out of gas and could no longer pay for it. Good try.

The connection is all of these people, in some way, needed help. And while there are even better examples, these are real-life examples I have personally witnessed. Not only did they need help, people were there to help before they could ask for it.

I often think about ways to help people. It's easy for me, as a stay-at-home mom to get caught up in the daily things, but that is no kind of example to lead for the children I am trying to raise up in the ways of the Lord.

Here's where it gets jumbled, but in my head it makes sense. Just go with me here…

Several years ago I was walking into a fast food place, and a young boy, without prompting, saw me and opened the door for me. I may have even mentioned this before…it wouldn't surprise me because it meant so much for me. I remember thinking, That's how I want my kids to be. When I'm not around, I want them to see a need, a place to serve and just do it.

While we were helping that guy look for his wallet, I explained to Kaylee that someone else's daddy lost their wallet and we were going to help him look for it.

Even if they are not ready completely, I want them to know what is going on.

When we're visiting Adam and he has to go out on a call, I explain to Kaylee that someone is sick or needs help and that Daddy is going to help.

It's important for them to know that not everyone has everything they need. We help those we can. Serve those we can. See a need, and if we can, we meet it. We take meals to people who need them. We donate things when we can.

But, for me, there are times I struggle with this. I have a really hard time when I hear about a need and I can't do anything about it. I have a hard time when I see a homeless or needy person and can't help. If I'm alone or by myself with the kids, for safety reasons I do not ever stop to help anyone. I also have a hard time discerning if someone really needs help, or if it is a ploy.

This wasn't even a way I used to think until we were recently approached by the same woman in multiple different parking lots… The first time we saw her she told us she ran out of gas and needed money to get a little more to get home. We offered to follow her to the gas station, but she declined. She didn't really want the gas, she just wanted money.

So the whole discernment thing is something I'm working on.

I transcribed a sermon that really spoke about this, and soon I'll share some insight I gained from it because this thought/thing/process is definitely something heavy on my heart.

 

 

So Far Behind

I started a post the other night, then decided I needed to add pictures…it was supposed to be a quick download and then back to the blog. However…I did not realize there were so many pictures on the camera…over 1300 to be exact (or not so exact). Some had been downloaded and not erased…and well…it just took much longer. Like everything in my life.

 

I need to post pictures and talk about the fair. It was a long time ago, but the kids had so much fun I feel I need to capture some of the memories.

I need to blog about Logan's first birthday…I mean, really people, how can I not?

 

I need to blog about our trip to the DC Zoo.

 

I've just been running out of time to write about everything. Fortunately, I've had a good bit of work lately. I've also been working on making my own cloth diapers. By the time everything has come, and as quickly as I'm working on them, they should all be ready about the time the kids go off to college. Perfect!

 

Without time to breathe in sight, I'll just slap something down… Hopefully I'll find more time soon.

2 Going on 12

I commonly say my two year old is a 12 year old…

Case in point…

She walks into my room the other morning, "Mommy, can I borrow your belt?"

Me: Uh, sure. (Thinking…the thing could probably wrap around you 16 times, but who cares?)

Kaylee: Thank you.

…and she walks away.

Not even in school, and already she wants to borrow my clothes. Not to mention the fact she nearly plowed me over to get to my heels when I was getting ready for a show. Nice. Really, really nice.

Change…or something…

Okay, first of all, I have to say that those catchy titles that everyone else comes up with…well your secret is out and I'm going to buy the book you have. Until then…yeah, see above. That's what you get.

Ahem…

So I wrote a post about this the other day, and it wouldn't post, so quickly, because I know you're on the edge of your seat wondering…yes, I'm looking for a new hairstyle. Wow…glad I got that out there. I'm sure you're glad too. But see, the problem is I have an unruly mane very thick, hard to deal with hair. So I might see a hairstyle I love, and be totally unable to support it. So anyway…if you see someone roaming down the street resembling a beast, it might just be me, with a bad cut…or something like that.

But on to today, the real issue at hand. I woke up with a list of to-dos longer than I knew I could accomplish. I got on somewhat of a good run with it, however, and my outlook was bright. I made it through my first transcription within a reasonable amount of time.

Then somewhere, I don't even remember when, I got into a fight over Cheerios. Seriously…Cheerios.

Kaylee, plainly on purpose, dumped an entire bowl of Cheerios on the floor. So, I asked her to please pick them up. She declined. And, well, because a request like that is not declinable in this house, the cartoon she was currently being allowed to watch was turned off…until she picked up the Cheerios. She declined again. Sparing every little detail, it turned into an enormous struggle, veering off the Cheerio path and coming back.

Mind you, it wasn't entirely about the Cheerios. It was about discipline and follow through on my part, and teaching obedience and respect on Kaylee's part. And boy is it hard.

I really had too much to do to deal with it. I needed to get my work finished. I needed to work on other things. I needed to get some housework done. (Which, by the way, never got touch, let alone accomplished.) And I most certainly didn't need to get into a fight over Cheerios.

The fact of the matter was, however, that I had to deal with it. It wasn't about winning or domineering. It was about loving my little girl so much that, even though she didn't like it at the time, I taught her that her behavior wasn't acceptable or to be tolerated.

Being that Kaylee is now two and a half, struggles like this are happing more often than they used to. She is very bright, and knows how to work the system, if you know what I mean. She really is a good girl. She uses her manners almost all of the time. She is kind to her brother. She listens…most of the time. I really am not complaining about her…or really even the day we had today.

All I'm saying is that it's hard sometimes disciplining. It's easier to flip on Backyardigans, Dora or whatever and deal with it…later. But later might never come. It might always be…later. Then what?

So as tired as it might make me, and as hard as it is, I have to keep going. Press on. Pick my battles, but press on. Because I love my kids, and it can be no other way.

 

Happy Birthday Bubba

One year ago today our little Logan was born. And to state the obvious, our lives have not been the same since.

I went into labor somewhere around 4:00 in the morning. Adam was supposed to work that day, so near the time the alarm was going to go off, I told him I didn't think he was going to have to go. Being about 10 days past the due date, he wasn't too surprised. We waited a while longer before we called anyone as a week before we went to the hospital thinking we were coming home with Logan. Well, I suppose we did come home with him, just not in a car seat.

It was somewhere around noon that we dropped Kaylee off with Mom so that she could eat and have a nap.

Now, of course there had to be something else going on that day. For some reason Zoe decided she needed to have some kind of growth/spot/thing happen on her leg the day before. So throughout our entire getting ready and trying to get into the mindset of getting ready to have a baby, we were figuring out how to get her to the vet. Long story short…Jason took her and it was a fungus. No big deal.

On with having a baby…

When we got to the hospital, I wasn't too far along in the labor. (Meaning progression, not hours.)

The midwife, who happened to be on call that day…her only on call day that week…and the midwife I wanted the most, said to walk. So walk we did. We walked. And we walked. And we walked. And we walked. Stairs. THE BRIDGE. Hallways. Stairs. THE BRIDGE. Hallways. Cafeteria. Stairs. Hallways. Okay, okay, you get the point. We walked.

She told us if I had progressed even a tiny bit she would break my water, necessitating me to stay and ensuring we would have our little, albeit very comfortable, baby.

At one point, a nurse asked me some question. I am not really sure what it was, but it was something getting at if I had any depression symptoms. My response was something to the effect of, "Not unless you send me home…" To which she couldn't stop laughing. Perhaps she wasn't used to witty women in labor. I don't know.

Fortunately, after what seemed like hours of walking (oh wait, it was hours of walking) I progressed just enough to have my water broken. Thankthelord.

Therein lied the problem to my non-ability to progress. I had so much water that…well, I'll spare the details. There was a lot. Enough that we were all laughing as it… Oh, that's right. I'm sparing the details.

The hours passed and things actually started to progress. The midwife, not truly making predictions, said she thought it would most likely be evening when we delivered.

Evening came and went.

Later in the night?

Later in the night came and went.

By that time, I was so tired I really didn't know if I had it in me to do it anymore. I was all over the place, just trying to find some kind of position that would help me. I went into the bathroom (scenery change needed, perhaps?). It was there that we almost had our baby. Almost.

The nurses were funny. One came running in saying, "You can't have your baby in here!"

Oh yeah? Well, it looks like it might just be happening.

The midwife, on the other hand, was totally calm. She gathered what she needed and was prepared…and maybe a little squished.

However, having a strong firefighter for a husband isn't such a bad thing. *wink* During a three second break, he carried me to the bed where I proceeded to have our 9lb 3.9 oz baby boy at 12:08 on September 25, 2008.

Literally, from the second he was born, I could tell his personality was so different from his sisters.

My original plan had been to have Kaylee in the waiting room, for someone to bring her in, and for the four of us to spend time together, alone, before anyone else came in. Being after midnight however, my plan didn't work.

The next day when Kaylee came, she was most interested in walking the floor to show all the nurses her new purse…a present for the big sister. Oh, and I think she realized her baby brother was there too. ?? :)

 

The past year seems to have passed so quickly. From taking our little pumpkin to the pumpkin patch mere days after birth, to watching him grow and blossom into such a funny little guy.

He is really easy going, that is unless you make him mad. Oh, what a temper.

He is such a joy. He loves his big sister so much. I love to watch him watch her. He tries to do what she is doing…and sometimes it works. He hasn't started walking, but baby it's just a matter of time.

I often gaze at my children and tears just start to flow. I am so blessed. God has entrusted to Adam and me precious life, and I am at times overwhelmed by the enormity of that.

The next years promise to be filled with even more that this first one, Logan. My prayer for you is that you grow into the boy and then the man God has created you to be. You have a soft spirit already, and I pray that you will have compassion for others. When you get on the bus to go to school and there is a little lonely kid, I pray that you will be Jesus to them. Sit with them. Show them the love we try to show to you at home. Always listen to the prompting of the Holy Spirit. dream big and then go for it. Your daddy and I will always love you. We will be here to support you to the best of our abilities. Logan, my dear, sweet Logan, I love you more than words can express. Happy Birthday, Bubba.

My Funny Girl

Sunday, as the offering plate was about to be passed, Penny (Mimi) asked Kaylee, "Do you want to give some money to God?"

Kaylee, "Yes…"

As the girl walked off with the plate, with "Kaylee's" dollar inside, Kaylee said, "There goes God."

    -----    -----    -----    -----    -----    -----    -----

Most of today has been hard. The kids were extra busy this morning as I tried to work. I was having an extra hard time with the work I was doing…for whatever unknown reason. I made naptime earlier. The kids seemed tired. The kids were not tired. Naptime was almost as horrible hard has the earlier part of the morning.

Finally…and I mean finally, they fell asleep. The house became quiet. And in my spirit there was such a release that all I could do was cry. And cry. And cry.

There is something deeply freeing about being able to cry when no one is around. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. You don't have to stop until you are ready. And you don't really have to have a reason.

I spent some time refocusing and the rest of the day went much better.

I am very thankful for a friend who encouraged me during my rough morning. Her long-distance friendship means so much to me, and I am so thankful for her.

I am also thankful for God's orchestration of even our emotions. He knows when to send us encouragement, and He knows when we need to sort things out. There have been times when I have felt sad or lonely or distraught and I've prayed for God to send someone or something to encourage me. And sometimes He chooses not to in order that I might look to Him even more.

(I'm not saying that God is not always our Encourager, but we are relational beings and there are times we need something tangible…it's just how we were created.)

And out of the times when He chooses to be my only Encourager, I have grown tremendously. And when He allows someone or something to step into my life in the exact moment I need it, there is no other explanation other than God's grace. Either way, it's God in my life…showing me who He is.

I hope tomorrow is better than today. But if it should be another hard day, I know God will lead me to the end closer to Him than I was even today as long as I keep my eyes fixed on Him.

 

Encouragement

To someone looking in, I would say they could assume that my life is perfect. I mean, wonderful, loving, talented husband. Two kids…healthy, picture-perfect cute (you know, if I could ever get them both to look at the camera at the same time). ;) Two dogs. House. Vehicles. Provisions that I am thankful every day of my life.

And yes, I will never for a second downplay my immense blessings.

But that person looking in would only get a partial view. This is the same for anyone who looks at another woman and thinks, "She has it all. If only I could be a little more like her, I'd be happy." Blessed…yes. Perfect, one to be envied…far from it. (Oh, and for the record, the Queen of Comparisons…we won't even go there.)

Lately I've felt in my spirit a quickening…a breakthrough on the horizon. Only…it hasn't come, yet. And if I don't constantly return my spirit to the focus it should have, I tend to sit down at pity party…table for one…far more than I would like to admit.

Now I fully believe this breakthrough, or whatever it is, will come. But, ah, God, can You hurry it up? Has anyone been there? You pray, wait, pray, wait…and you feel oh so close. And then nothing. Or at least it seems like nothing.

I just started Beth Moore's Esther. And although everything has been good, one line caught my attention because it was in big letters in the margin it spoke so clearly to me.

"When we trust our lives to the unseen but ever-present God, He will write our lives into His story and every last one of them will turn out to be a great read. With a grand ending."

Now this anticipation feeling...it's always lingering, but fortunately not always super-strong. Otherwise I'd be exhausted-more than I am anyway.

So I'm in for the journey, wherever it may go. I'm so excited to do the rest of the study. I have my running shoes on, ready to go. Okay, okay, okay, you got me. I have my large coffee in hand, ready to go. Go on, go on, laugh. You know you want to.

I look forward to sharing bits and pieces of Esther: It's Tough Being a Woman. Amen, Beth, you said it. And perhaps you said it best when you said that one of the hardest parts of being a woman is other women. But truth be told, in my opinion, it can also be one of the best parts of being a woman.

I truly cherish the few, close girl-friends I have.

And while I might look at some other girl and wish I could fit into her super-skinny jeans, I know that my post-baby pouch would only fall over the edge, resulting in a less than glamorous effect. But you know what? That's really okay because Ms. Super-Skinny Jean girl might be looking at my babies and wish she too could have kids. So you never know what is going on through the glass window. It might not be as clear as it appears.

 

 

 

Here and There

I can't believe it's already September. I'm mere days away from having a 1-year-old! By this time when Kaylee was little, she had been running around for months. Logan, however, is taking his time…which is fine by me! He has been crawling for a while, and is getting pretty good at pulling up and occasionally standing on his own. More on Logan later…

We just spent a long weekend in West Virginia, visiting family again. It was way too fun and way too quick. I can't wait to post pictures…but they are still on the camera.

I'm really excited about starting Beth Moore's Esther tomorrow. Her insight and presentation is truly a gift and a blessing. I come away so enriched after each of her studies, conferences, and books. I can't wait to see what this one has in store.

I've also been working on several sewing projects, so if I ever get them finished and I hope to post some pictures of them sometime soon. Unfortunately there is not a good fabric store around, so I have to order a few things online…thus slowing the projects even more.

So, that's a small bit of what has been going on, and is getting ready to go on. I have been pretty much neglecting the blog, and need to get back to it.

 

 

 

What Color Are His Eyes?

Yes friends, that is the first thing Kaylee wanted to know when she caught this:

Rewind the clock a few days…

We were at Wal-Mart fighting for our lives through the crowds shopping for a few things. Adam went to look for one thing, and I went to look for something else. When we met back up, he had one thing…and another-Dora fishing pole. Somehow we managed to hide it in the pole until we got home. That evening, while I worked, they practiced with 'practice fish.'

Then…the poor little fishergirl had to wait through the entire next day to actually go to the riber. As soon as Adam walked through the door, Kaylee exclaimed, "Are you ready to go fishing in the riber?" So they packed their stuff and off they went.

Part way through the trip I got a phone call…a rather excited phone call. Kaylee, on her tiny, little rod, had managed to catch a fish bigger than anything Adam had ever caught.

They kept it out of the water long enough to look at it a minute and take a few pictures. As Adam was showing it to her, all Kaylee wanted to know was, "What color are his eyes?"

Adam asked her if she wanted to keep the fish or put it back. Her response, "Put him back. He has to eat."

So tonight, somewhere in the river, a happy BIG fish is eating. You're welcome, Mr. Fish, you're welcome.

Like a Girl

My head is in overload…in a good way though.

This weekend our church was a simulcast location for the Beth Moore conference. It.was.amazing. I've done her studies before and attended another simulcast last year, but this particular one was just simply amazing. My mind and my heart are still digesting what I heard, so until I get wrapped around it, I'm going to keep a little quiet. More to come on that later.

 

Kaylee in her two-year-old wisdom and, well…I don't really even know what to call it…she constantly makes me wonder where she learns things. I say that nothing surprises me anymore, but honestly, everything surprises me. This morning I was getting her dressed, and after I put her shirt on, she flipped her head to the side a little.

"Kaylee, what are you doing?"

"I'm flipping my head like a girl." Man, o man… Girl, o girl, rather. Where do you learn these things?

The day before she said, "Give it to me straight up, Mamma," referring to her ice cream. I don't recall ever even saying that phrase, much less around her. I mean seriously, we watch every.single.word we say. For we know those words will be repeated, but we do not know where those words will be repeated.

 

Logan continues to be Mr. Super-Easy baby. He is generally happy and sometimes naked. Yesterday I looked over and saw him looking out our front door. Somehow he had managed to escape from his diaper, which happened to be the only thing he had on. I think he is starting say Mamma…and really mean it. I cannot believe he is going to be turning one in less than a month. I may have mentioned that before, but really…I can't believe it.

Although still mostly happy, I think Logan is entering into a frustrated stage. He wants to be able to walk, but can't master it yet. He is on the go, yet doesn't know where to go. And that blasted dog food remains just out of reach.

 

 

 

Going Cloth

Diapers that is…

About a week-and-a-half ago we switched to cloth diapers for Logan. It was actually kind of an exciting switch for me…although I can't really say for sure why. It's definitely not because I have to wash all of the poop out… :) However, when I calculated the potential monthly savings and then potential yearly savings, I just had to try it. And I have to say, it is really nice to go to the store and not even glance to see if diapers are on sale. Now of course, there will still be times we use disposable, but for the most part we hope to use these.

His little Logan bum looks pretty cute in them too!

And well…speaking of the little Logan bum, and the kid who wears it (the bum)…he has been moving very quickly, pulling up on everything, and getting into everything. There have been times I thought he might take a step, but he just falls to the floor and takes off again.

He really has no interest in walking. With Kaylee we would hold her hands and she would walk all over the place…not so with this one. He gets there his own way. Thankyouverymuch.

Recently we've been playing this little game. It was called: Logan swiftly moves to dog bowl, grabs two fists-full of dog food, crams one into face, mommy pulls dog food out of mouth, meanwhile Logan crams other fist-full into face. Repeat game as often as possible. Game is only over when dog food is placed very high and all other dog food particles are swept off the floor.

Yeah, it's a fun game. Its retail cost tends to vary, but currently runs about $28 for an entire bag of fun. You really should try it sometime. Another one that is fun to play at the same time is: while mommy puts dog food away, run to get into "little" potty. The rules and regulations of this one are still being worked out. Right now they consist of: Logan! No! Get out of there! Yuck! Followed by a brisk washing of hands if said hands got farther than lid on "little" potty.

 

Refocus

It's so easy when we're focused on praying for something specific, or something that really matters to us that we can forget to pay attention to the needs of other. At least that's the way it is with me. I'm usually pretty quick to pick up on what might be going on with someone else and do what I can to support and uplift them.
But recently I've had a lot on my mind. There is always a lot going on around here…with the kids growing so quickly, constantly learning new things and new skills that I can't blame it on that. But I would blame it on what has been going on in my head. Now, my head can be an exciting and dangerous place at the same time. We won't even start in on that.
The things I've been focused on are of, what I would consider, utmost importance at this time. However, I would like to take some time to switch the focus a little and send some thoughts, blessings, and maybe small gifts out to whoever would like to leave a comment, their name and address on my blog.
If you don't want to leave it on my blog, simply send me an email and soon you will receive, in your mailbox, something from me. Hopefully it will brighten your day and make you smile. I know, as much as I love email, I love going to the mail box and finding something fun. Because heaven knows, bills and junk mail are not.fun.at.all.
adamandkristen86@yahoo.com

By the way, sorry for the yucky font...Word will not publish my posts at the time.

Four Years Ago

Thursday, Adam and I celebrated our four year anniversary. We were actually able to get away on the anniversary itself, go to Massanutten, spend the night and enjoy some alone time. It was so nice to get away…just the two of us…and have some quiet.

After dinner at Hanks (the place that catered the wedding) we went back and decided to take a walk. We saw a number of deer which were much accustomed to people as we were able to get pretty close to them before they ran…but not very far.

It was actually kind of funny to pack to go somewhere and not have to take half the contents of the entire house. We made it to the room with all our stuff in just one trip!

(Funny side story…I was packing, Adam had to run out for a while, and Logan was napping. That left Kaylee…alone. Yeah, right. I was just in the other room, but evidentially her skills at being quiet while pouring out the entire contents of a salt and pepper shaker are great. I didn't even hear her until I went to check on her. (And she is quick too…I only let her play for a very, very short time without being checked on.) She informed me she was making me some salt and pepper. All.over.the.table.floor.boosterseat.and surrounding area.)

Back to the point…our anniversary…

Words don't seem to do justice to explain how much I love my husband. I know. I know…it sounds sappy. But really, I stand amazed when I think of how blessed I am by Adam. He loves me and sometimes I really think he knows me better than I know myself. He works so hard so I can stay home with the kids. Although I work, there is no way if he didn't do as much as he does I could stay home.

He is a great dad. There is nothing that can bring me to tears more quickly than to think of how he loves those kids and me.

And although we have our moments like every couple, there is no one else I would rather share my life's journey with. He's the one I want to go to bed with and wake up with every day.

So honey, I love you. Thank you for loving me in spite of my flaws. Thank you for helping me be a better person and a better mom. Thanks for all you do. Thanks for being not only a hero to others as you serve as a firefighter, but thanks for being my hero. And I'm not being mushy…I'm being honest. You keep me real and know when I'm not. These past four years have been filled to the brim with love, joy, some pain and heartache, silliness and the real thing. We've lost one baby and had two. We have a huge future together waiting to be filled with so many more moments. I can't wait. But I cherish every day. Life is precious. It can be too short. I don't want to take for granted what we have together. We have a life and a marriage some only dream of and others can never achieve. I'm not saying that braggingly or boastfully…just thankful and fully acknowledging what God has lavished on us. It is because of His great love we can love and love others. He brought us together to love each other, our kids and those we meet. I pray our house would be a place which reflects the love of the Father…a place of safety and fun for our kids and their friends to play. A place of refuge from the storm.

Confession

I have a confession. There are monsters who live in my house. I know this to be a true fact, so don't question me or say that monsters aren't real. I have proof…

You see, I am constantly cleaning and organizing my house. Always. (Or almost) I do 500,000 loads of laundry each day. (No exaggerating at all.) Sweep. Straighten. Throw away. Wipe. Sweep again. Yet, the moment my eyes close hundreds…nay, thousands of these monsters seep out of the walls (or wherever they live) and mess everything up. Of course they are silent, so as not to wake the dogs. They're smart like that.

I've set traps, but all I come up with is cracker crumbs and empty sippy cups. I must become more sly in my trapping means.

Note: the following pictures are posted for sheer cuteness. They have *nothing* to do with the previously mentioned monsters.

Worth a Thousand Words

So they say a picture is worth a thousand words. And since I am too tired to write a thousand (more) words today…having already typed almost two hours of audio…thousands of words…I'll leave you with some super cute pictures.

Enjoy…

So what's this pretending thing all about?

Kaylee loves to pretend. Logan, obviously, doesn't know what it means to pretend. When you put a spoon in his little mouth there best be something on it. So you can imagine his surprise when Kaylee just tried to feed him pretend grapes and broccoli…

He happily opened his mouth several times as she put the play spoon in his mouth…never once getting a real bite of what she "made" him.

He didn't get mad. After all, it was his beloved and adored sister who did this. Now if I tried that trick with him there would be trouble…words…mean faces of all kinds.

This past weekend was great. My cousin Kelly was married to Ben in a beautiful service…pictures to come later.

Sunday we went to church, as we usually do. After church we were going to Adam's parents for his birthday lunch…all was good. Then, close to the end of the service Michelle's phone rang. It was pretty strange for the particular caller to be calling, so she stepped out to return the phone call. Before she had finished sitting down she was whispering to me, "Pam Swecker just coded in church…" What? She did what? What happened? The remainder of the service became a blur, as I partially tried to focus on the amazing song going on, but mostly tried to comprehend what was going on.

Before we left church we learned that our dear friend (who I met in the rescue squad) had passed away while she was at church. Evidentially it was even their children's church Sunday. The night before Pam and her family celebrated their daughter's 7^th birthday. She has another boy who is only a few years older.

My heart aches even now as I think of the devastation this family is going through. It was sudden. It was far from expected. From what I understand there were no warnings at all.

As I tucked my babies into bed I tried to savor every nanosecond of it. I know when she tucked her kids in bed Saturday night she had no clue it would be her last time to do so.

Life is fleeting.

A moment.

A vapor.

How many times do I go through the motions, forget to love and appreciate the ones I love? I hate to think it…but any day could be the last, or the last of someone I love. We can't live a life of regret for moments we might not have savored. We can't live a life of regret for things we didn't do. But we can live life now. We can go pray over our kids as they sleep. We can hug and kiss them a few more times every day. We can linger a little longer as we hug and kiss our husband. We can stop for a minute and send an email to a friend, reminding them how much they mean to us.

We also can't live life in fear. This, at times, can be hard. With a firefighter husband I know there are real dangers to his job. I have to take every thought captive that would lead me to think about what could happen. I can't fear something happening to him or to my kids. And as hard as it is to sometimes put this into action, it must be done. God has not given us a spirit of fear. We have been given HIS Spirit.

So as I reflect on the loss of a friend, taken too soon it would seem, I pray for her family. I pray for her husband. I pray for her little boy. I pray for her little girl. My eyes swell with tears as I think of these two, so close to their momma, now going without her. But the Lord will be their strength. He will carry them through.

If you've made it to the end of this post, please say a prayer for my friends. They need them now more than ever.

Thanks.

Beach Trip, part 2

Since coming home life has been very busy. I came home to plenty of work, which is great. I've been really enjoying listening to the different sermons and seminars I've been transcribing. But all that work leaves not too much time to blog and document the kid's first beach trip.

This weekend Kelly, my cousin, is getting married and I'm doing the flowers, so again…not much time.

Most of the time we were on the beach Logan was most content when we dug a hole and put him in it. I suppose it made him feel a bit more secure in the vast, open space.

I've been to the beach before, so I can't imagine what was going on in his little head as we took him to such a different place. Having a cold didn't help, but the little guy is so observant that it must have been overwhelming just to be there. He wasn't much of one for the water most of the time. There were a few times he started to enjoy himself, but for the most part the hole it was.

Kaylee on the other hand, jumped right in. There actually wasn't much pause when we first got there. No standing in awe. Not really many questions. Just running on the sand. She was a very good listener for almost the entire vacation. We rarely had to repeat instructions or continuously tell her to come back, don't do that, come here, stop running…all of that. I think she knew that we were in such a different place there was no messing around. There were a few times she got bold and started to go to the water without us, but I was actually surprised at how well she listened…the first time.

Oh, there's so much more to write about, but for now I'll just post a bunch of picture and then try to come back and fill in gaps with stories and such.

Excuse the oversized and stretched tank top I can frequently be seen wearing. It makes me look like a cow. I wore it because the bathing suit I have was what I wore last year when I was pregnant with Logan and now is too big. In the ocean especially. And since I wanted to play with the kids and not worry about flashing all beach goers...I donned what would ultimately make me look bovine-ish in all of the pictures. …and yes, I did get a new suit for the beach, but it wasn't much better on the side of staying put in the ocean. Perhaps one day I will find one that fits well. Donations would be greatly appreciated. Just kidding…or not.