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There is no meaning to the title…just seems you have to have one.

Ahem…

Tonight, I'm truly too tired to write. I feel there is so much going on, yet nothing. Do you know what I'm talking about? However, no matter how little I write, I'd like to try to keep up a bit more as part of the journey with this little one inside causing all, most of, some of, all of, part of tiredness. We're currently somewhere around 12 or 13 weeks…I can't really keep track. I continue to be sick most days, which is really taking a toll.

I feel I'm not being a good mom and a good wife, but I also know I have to grow this one. Adam has been my rock through it all…watching the kids extra, cooking, cleaning, making me hot tea, making sure I sleep in when I can.

Toward the end of today, it was so rough. All I wanted to do was fall into bed, yet I had to feed and take care of the other two. I told Kaylee how tired I was. She understands the baby makes me tired and sick, and she looked at me and said, "Mommy, why don't you lay in your bed? I'll watch Logan for you. I can do it." It was all I could do to keep it together. My sweet little girl, you can sure test my patience, but boy, you're one special little girl.

For the record, as tempting as it was, I didn't take Kaylee up on her offer.

Yes, these days are rough, but that's all they are…days. They'll come and go. Soon enough, this baby will be here. Our lives will be even more changed than they are now. This life is worth any amount of sickness and tiredness. The breaks where I feel well, are a needed and noticed blessing. The times I don't feel well are a reminder that the life inside me is growing, thriving, and being fearfully and wonderfully made. I know that full well.

My camera has been in hibernation recently, but being as the weather is turning warm and beautiful, it needs to wake up. I promise pictures before November. Promise.